Little Behavioural Problems Parents Shouldn't Ignore
Kids will be kids, and as a parent, it’s important to give your kid her space. At the same time, there are certain small things that are important to keep a check on - and at the same time, easy to correct.
Kids love attention - so much that too little of it from parents and loved ones has been linked to problematic behaviour such as playing truant and lack of respect for authority. However, on the other end of the spectrum, it’s important to manage your child’s expectations, as he/she can’t be the centre of attention 24x7! Kids who frequently interrupt conversations are often found to have problems with listening to, and later, empathising with other kids as well adults. A child who acts out seeking attention will develop the mentality that she's entitled to other people's attention and won't be able to tolerate frustration.
Rough play with friends
While aggression, like pushing and punching, always gets grownups’ attention, subtler violent behaviours like pinching, almost accidental shoving and hair pulling, can be equally problematic. In fact, kids tend to convince themselves that anything that they are not being chided for is acceptable behaviour. This tends to manifest in elevated levels of violent behaviour at later ages.
To correct this, make sure your child learns to tolerate not being the focus of the room all the time. If he/she acts out, demanding attention, inform him/her that she needs to respect others when they are talking, or they won’t be heard when they speak, themselves.
Keep an eye out for subtle signs of such behaviour. If you find it, work to teach your child how to deal with anger. Create empathy with questions - ‘You just hurt your friend. Would you like it if he did that to you?’
Children who pretend their parents don’t exist are likely to have serious problems with authority in the future. The reasoning is simple - while they may seem to be innocuously immersed in their own worlds, they are most often conscious that they are being spoken to. Allowing them to get away with ignoring instructions allows an easy loophole for disobedience and dishonesty in the future.
Kids love having a good story to tell, and often, they will spice up little details. This is all very well when there’s a grownup around to clarify that no, the monkey at the zoo was not the size of a building. But when the exaggerations are simpler and more believable - I sat in a helicopter yesterday’, ‘My daddy is a karate black belt’ or ‘I have a pet elephant in my grandparents’ village’ - it becomes important to step in and have a talk.
Lying can become second nature if a child figures out that it’s a way to make himself look better or avoid getting in trouble.
To check such behaviour, instill into your child the habit of looking into a person’s eyes when they are speaking to them. If ignored in public, go up to your child, gently hold his shoulders and look into his eyes, speaking slowly and clearly. Later, inform him that ignoring his parents will lead to his own requests being not ignored and denied.
Young children often imitate older kids, and a little bit of sass, attitude or back answering may develop as a result of this. While many parents dismiss this as a phase, it’s important to address it, as it can easily lead to rude and rebellious preteen behaviour.
Explaining to a child that her behaviour is disrespectful is an important part of correcting such attitude problems. Further, reminding them that such disrespectful tone and body language are going to be met with disregard for their requests will help them learn to listen fairly and with regard.
Being restless even for short durations
While some kids may actually suffer from ADHD and other related problems, a lot of kids are simply excessively fidgety and noisy - this often magnifies into the inability to respect the privacy and requests of others in a public setting. The inability to focus is often linked with difficulty in concentrating on conversations in real time, nail-biting, as well as slouchy and poor posture and perceived lack of self-confidence.
Teaching kids healthy hobbies, especially ones that involve concentration - such as reading, drawing and painting - is a simple and fun way to improve their concentration and teach them to enjoy silence.
We hope you gained something from this article. Remember to be patient and consistent with your little ones, and to be there to talk and support them at all times.
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